We decided to have a relaxed evening last night (movie night watching Shrek and having a PJ Picnic) and were hoping to get to bed early. Well, after a very sweet talk with Tyler about school and life I finally said good night around 7:30. Then 8:00 came around and he was hot and couldn't sleep, then 8:30, and then 9:00 and finally he got himself settled down enough to fall asleep. And believe it or not, I heard his door open at 5:30 this morning to use the bathroom and not sure if he actually fell back to sleep because he was definitely up before 7:00 ready to get dressed for school! He put his outfit on and ran into Teddy's room where Adam was feeding him and said "Daddy, do I look like a kindergartner?" Ohhh, it made me teary eyed and it was hardly 7:00 am. I was also feeling nervous, anxious, and excited for the day. He and Ethan both were hyped up and kind of all over the place this morning. At one point, I pulled Tyler aside and gave him my guardian angel that almost feels like a flat marble. I told him that it will keep him safe, make him brave, and give him strength just like it has for me. He looked at it with his big chocolate and gave me a huge smile. I told him to rub it if he ever needed some extra help or good energy. He then said "just like you always did at the hospital. It really works." He put it in his pocket, said his thank you, and then was off playing some more. A tender moment I will always remember. We finally got out of the house around 12:10 for the bus to arrive at 12:17. Tyler let me take a few pictures and Matthew wanted his picture taken too. The boys were still pretending they were pirates and next thing we knew the bus was right in front of us. I was like "whoa, here's the bus. It's time boys." And next thing we knew, we were walking across the street and I saw Tyler reach into his pocket and grab for the guardian angel I gave him and then he turned around at the top of the stairs and was like "I got it Mommy" and gave me a big smile and the next thing I know the door closes and off the bus goes. And then the flood gates opened up and I couldn't help myself. The vision of the bus driving away and my healthy little boy experiencing something new all by himself was almost too much for me. It's such a bittersweet moment and one I've always known was coming but nothing could prepare for that feeling. A feeling that I'm sure will come again many times throughout this journey of parenthood, but still doesn't make it easy. Poor little Matty was also upset because "I wanna get on the bus too. When can I got to school with Tyler?" He wasn't very happy, but a quick recommendation of playing Candy Land got us quickly back to "normal". It will be a process we are going to have to get used to. I know Tyler is more than ready and has been looking forward to this day for a long time. I hope so much for his experience to be a positive one and a great foundation to a lifetime of learning. He is our special little buddy and I'm still tearing up as I type this. The smells of the cake baking fills the air and we are going to have a big "first day of school" celebration upon his return with Daddy!
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